A poem in 15 couplets

Violent storms savaged the vessel,
In unyielding torrents, wrestle,
My makeshift raft bobs on the swell,
Bound for the inky depths of hell,
Ship plunged down to the oceans deep,
Hopes adrift, what fingers can’t keep,
Indian Ocean, heavy hue,
Swallowed up the souls of my crew,
Woe! Beneath, water beats, fins peek,
Despair lapping, over rolls, bleak,
Wet cloth, sombre dolorous blues,
With the salty terrors perfuse,
Cursed rouge be the blue planet,
Give me earth - chalk, stone or granite,
Bottomless marine abundance,
Sea meets sky, eyes meet redundance,
Shallow cerulean ceiling,
Blue washed, as dropped paint concealing,
The lurching blackness of nights claw,
Snatches the realm of no mans law,
Pleas pry free from my cracked, parched tongue,
Twister tore through, feeble float flung,
Darkened belly of midnight blue,
Churned up in the froth of the stew,
Cold teeth bites down with the shivers,
The hand which taketh, delivers,
An icy kiss of death, lips blushed,
To slip below, sailors song hushed.
Rippled from our watery graves,
Some still hear wailing on the waves.
Written to the prompt by dVerse, compose a poem in the theme of the colour ‘blue’.
Original poem by © Darius the Mate
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Wow! I read this twice, wonderful use of language, rhyme and narrative. You could feel the coldness of all the blues. I loved the phrases: bound for the inky depths of hell / cursed rouge be the blue planet, give me earth, chalk, stone or granite / lurching blackness of night’s claw / sailor’s song hushed. A sad tale but gorgeous language ❤
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Thank you from the bottom of the waves, Sunra! 🌊
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Well, I was following the ship and crew to the deep, but I paused in confusion at the cracked, parched tongue or was he drifting feebly on the flung float? At any rate, it was a riveting tale told well.
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😂 You’ll have to reread the line slowly Beverly! It’s a tongue twister on purpose – the meanings in there.
Thanks so much for the comment!
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A great poem in fifteen couplets, Darius! There’s nothing like a violent storm to get the pulses racing. I love the rhymes, especially ‘vessel/ wrestle’ and ‘planet/granite’, the expressive phrase ‘sombre dolorous blues’, and the lines (which remind me a little of ‘The Rime of the Ancient Mariner’:
‘Indian Ocean, heavy hue,
Swallowed up the souls of my crew’
and
‘Pleas pry free from my cracked, parched tongue,
Twister tore through, feeble float flung’ (great alliteration here by the way!).
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Yay! Thanks for this 😁 (the ‘tongue twister’ in the last lines you mentioned, was my favourite bit to write!)
Such a pleasure receiving your review, as always Kim.
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Fantastic, Darius! The only thing missing was bloated, blue bodies 😉
❤
David
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What a missed opportunity!
Two minds are better than one.
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🧠 + 🧠 = 💞
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